November Event:: Thanksgiving Parade
Nov 3, 2013 23:22:58 GMT -5
Spiffshine, lakooo, and 13 more like this
Post by brettolmsted on Nov 3, 2013 23:22:58 GMT -5
I want to say thank you Fraggle for hosting this great event. It is really cool to have this community effort to make this parade. Here is my submission for the November Parade Event. I believe I have fulfilled the assignment and I have even written a story. I had no idea how long this would be so please bear with me. I just started writing and before I knew it, it was 2 pages in length on Microsoft Word. Sorry.
Kent Brockman: Welcome to the 26th Annual Duff Springfield Thanksgiving Day Parade sponsored by Duff: Can’t Get Enough of that Wonderful Duff. I am your esteemed host, Kent Brockman. Over the next couple of hours I will be bringing you the highlights, and lowlights, of the annual Springfield Thanksgiving parade.
Arnie Pye: Excuse me Kent, I am CO-hosting this event…
Brockman: Oh…yeah….And this to my left is Barney Fyfe
Pye: That's ARNIE PYE,
b]Pye[/b] (muttering): you two bit, no talent, good for nothing, had more plastic surgery than Heidi Montag…
Brockman: What was that you said?
Pye: Oh, nothing Kent. Would you look at the crowd we have here today.
Brockman: Oh yes, the best and brightest have turned out for the big parade as it goes through the newly renovated downtown section of Springfield. Thank you Urban Renewal. I believe every Springfielder is present and accounted for. Even Booberella is here peddling her peanuts..
Pye: I think those are a little larger than PEAnuts…
Brockman: You can say that again.
Brockman: Oh look, we have Nelson “hee-hawing” at Mr. Burns, who apparently forgot that ghost hunting was so last month. Also, it seems we have an orgy of food venders and consumptionism leading Springfield to setting the Guinness Book of World Records for "Heaviest Town." Look, there is the Squeeky Voiced Teen hawking burgers, Booberella handling some nuts, and it looks like a large number of Springfielders are trying to get into the newly renovated Luigi’s, fresh off their time on Restaurant Impossible.
Pye: Either that or they are trying to run away from Selma hulu dancing.
Brockman: Excellent point. The sight of that body swaying in a coconut bra makes a person want to gouge their eyes out…or run into a restaurant known far and wide as a health risk that has been closed 3 times by the FDA, but keeps reopening on account of a lack of enforcement due to repeated government shutdowns.
Pye: Hey Kent, isn’t that Mayor Quimby around the corner holding some ominous, and very obvious, bags with money?
Brockman: Right you are Sly, I mean Pye, it looks like he is taking bribes from companies vying to secure the rights to sponsor next years parade.
Pye: Speaking of the parade Kent, what kind of floats do we have this year?
Brockman: Well the first is a float honoring the history and future of Springfield. It has the statue of our founder Jebadiah Springfield and also has Patty on it, who looks to be asleep and dreaming of women. This is in response to Springfield legalizing same-sex marriage.
Brockman: On our second attraction we have our float honoring Santa Claus, that patron saint of the consumer season we are about to embark on. Hey, where’s the jolly fat man
Pye (muttering): He’s right next to me….
Brockman: What?
Pye: It looks like Springfield’s Santa this year, Barney Gumble, is passed out drunk just behind the float, just like in A Miracle on 34th Street. And it looks like Abe Simpson has stepped up to fill in.
Brockman: Then why is he sleeping?
Pye: Perhaps he was just on the bench when the guys loaded it on the trailer and he was so comatose he never woke up?!?
Brockman: Well, what a fine parade this is turning out to be.
Brockman: Onto our last float. It is the Duff Float to “rid cartoon and television violence from the eyes of our children” or RCTVEC for short. On it is Sideshow Mel being blasted from a canon, followed by two overly large cartoon balloon animals carrying weapons of limited destruction.
Pye: Wait Kent. Look up in the sky, it looks like the kiddies will not be disappointed this year. Santa is flying over head. Literarlly, jolly old Saint Nick has come to Springfield…Kent…Kent…KENT!.. Where are you going?
Brockman (yelling as he is running off): I have to go get my Christmas list so I can give it to Santa. IT’S REALLY HIM!!!!!! IT’S REALLY HIM!!!!!!
Pye: And why is he considered the number one anchor around here? Huh??? Well this is Arnie Pye concluding our live coverage of the 26th Annual Duff Springfield Thanksgiving Day Parade sponsored by Duff: Can’t Get Enough of that Wonderful Duff. Please remember that all department stores are open 24 hours a day beginning the day before Thanksgiving all the way through December 26th. I have been told that countless low-paid immigrant workers have been hired to work around the clock just so you can make sure you get your child the last Xbox 2 that will only work as long has you have the highest price internet known to man, or the PS7 that does absolutely nothing new and is still not backward compatible which forces you to purchase new games at outrageous prices.
This is Arnie Pye, signing off for Kent “My marriage is on the rocks” Brockman, saying Happy Thanksgiving and Merry Christmas…err…Happy Holidays…err…What was the politically correct terminology we are allowed to say now?
I had so much fun making this scene that I decided to keep it in my town throughout the holiday season. I did modify it a bit just so it would not take up too much room. Here is the version I am leaving up:
Kent Brockman: Welcome to the 26th Annual Duff Springfield Thanksgiving Day Parade sponsored by Duff: Can’t Get Enough of that Wonderful Duff. I am your esteemed host, Kent Brockman. Over the next couple of hours I will be bringing you the highlights, and lowlights, of the annual Springfield Thanksgiving parade.
Arnie Pye: Excuse me Kent, I am CO-hosting this event…
Brockman: Oh…yeah….And this to my left is Barney Fyfe
Pye: That's ARNIE PYE,
b]Pye[/b] (muttering): you two bit, no talent, good for nothing, had more plastic surgery than Heidi Montag…
Brockman: What was that you said?
Pye: Oh, nothing Kent. Would you look at the crowd we have here today.
Brockman: Oh yes, the best and brightest have turned out for the big parade as it goes through the newly renovated downtown section of Springfield. Thank you Urban Renewal. I believe every Springfielder is present and accounted for. Even Booberella is here peddling her peanuts..
Pye: I think those are a little larger than PEAnuts…
Brockman: You can say that again.
Brockman: Oh look, we have Nelson “hee-hawing” at Mr. Burns, who apparently forgot that ghost hunting was so last month. Also, it seems we have an orgy of food venders and consumptionism leading Springfield to setting the Guinness Book of World Records for "Heaviest Town." Look, there is the Squeeky Voiced Teen hawking burgers, Booberella handling some nuts, and it looks like a large number of Springfielders are trying to get into the newly renovated Luigi’s, fresh off their time on Restaurant Impossible.
Pye: Either that or they are trying to run away from Selma hulu dancing.
Brockman: Excellent point. The sight of that body swaying in a coconut bra makes a person want to gouge their eyes out…or run into a restaurant known far and wide as a health risk that has been closed 3 times by the FDA, but keeps reopening on account of a lack of enforcement due to repeated government shutdowns.
Pye: Hey Kent, isn’t that Mayor Quimby around the corner holding some ominous, and very obvious, bags with money?
Brockman: Right you are Sly, I mean Pye, it looks like he is taking bribes from companies vying to secure the rights to sponsor next years parade.
Pye: Speaking of the parade Kent, what kind of floats do we have this year?
Brockman: Well the first is a float honoring the history and future of Springfield. It has the statue of our founder Jebadiah Springfield and also has Patty on it, who looks to be asleep and dreaming of women. This is in response to Springfield legalizing same-sex marriage.
Brockman: On our second attraction we have our float honoring Santa Claus, that patron saint of the consumer season we are about to embark on. Hey, where’s the jolly fat man
Pye (muttering): He’s right next to me….
Brockman: What?
Pye: It looks like Springfield’s Santa this year, Barney Gumble, is passed out drunk just behind the float, just like in A Miracle on 34th Street. And it looks like Abe Simpson has stepped up to fill in.
Brockman: Then why is he sleeping?
Pye: Perhaps he was just on the bench when the guys loaded it on the trailer and he was so comatose he never woke up?!?
Brockman: Well, what a fine parade this is turning out to be.
Brockman: Onto our last float. It is the Duff Float to “rid cartoon and television violence from the eyes of our children” or RCTVEC for short. On it is Sideshow Mel being blasted from a canon, followed by two overly large cartoon balloon animals carrying weapons of limited destruction.
Pye: Wait Kent. Look up in the sky, it looks like the kiddies will not be disappointed this year. Santa is flying over head. Literarlly, jolly old Saint Nick has come to Springfield…Kent…Kent…KENT!.. Where are you going?
Brockman (yelling as he is running off): I have to go get my Christmas list so I can give it to Santa. IT’S REALLY HIM!!!!!! IT’S REALLY HIM!!!!!!
Pye: And why is he considered the number one anchor around here? Huh??? Well this is Arnie Pye concluding our live coverage of the 26th Annual Duff Springfield Thanksgiving Day Parade sponsored by Duff: Can’t Get Enough of that Wonderful Duff. Please remember that all department stores are open 24 hours a day beginning the day before Thanksgiving all the way through December 26th. I have been told that countless low-paid immigrant workers have been hired to work around the clock just so you can make sure you get your child the last Xbox 2 that will only work as long has you have the highest price internet known to man, or the PS7 that does absolutely nothing new and is still not backward compatible which forces you to purchase new games at outrageous prices.
This is Arnie Pye, signing off for Kent “My marriage is on the rocks” Brockman, saying Happy Thanksgiving and Merry Christmas…err…Happy Holidays…err…What was the politically correct terminology we are allowed to say now?
I had so much fun making this scene that I decided to keep it in my town throughout the holiday season. I did modify it a bit just so it would not take up too much room. Here is the version I am leaving up:
[/quote]
Tatum: dear god y r we fighting. God: cuz u touch yourself at night. 